thanks, senior year

Back again!

It’s been nice, not worrying or stressing about what to put on the blog next. These past few weeks have been pretty slow and steady: no period of extreme stress of extreme excitement.

A few weeks ago, I got my senior photos done, and with my friends gearing up for final exams, graduation is just around the corner. I thought I’d write a little catch-up/senior year reflection today. It’s crazy how fast things have been moving! Throughout this reflection, I’ll be sprinkling in photos from the past couple of weeks in my life.

Since I graduated a quarter early (faster than 4 full years of undergraduate), it’s been interesting doing the 40-hour work-week while my friends are still in school. All throughout college, I was used to saying “no” to a lot plans and outings because I needed to study. This spring quarter has been so different because I’ve been the one saying “yes” to everything.

I thought I enjoyed routine and schedule, but it’s different when you’re doing the full-time work thing. I don’t know why I have this weird fear of the monotony of the 9-5, but I do: waking up at the crack of dawn, making my cup of coffee, getting on the train, working all through the day, going to the gym, making dinner at home, getting to bed by 10pm and repeat x5. It’s surprising how quickly I turned into a low-energy grandma. If I know I have plans to go out that night, I usually wake up with a feeling of dread, knowing I’ll be even more exhausted the next day.

But with that fear of monotony comes the craving to spice up my life and schedule, and I find myself doing so by making plans with everyone. I’ve been getting better at not planning my life out down to the minute like I used to, but it’s still satisfying for me to see a full schedule. I’m happy that I’m putting forth effort into my relationships that I want to maintain, because it really is different when you don’t see friends everyday at school anymore. It’s been making me cherish friendships with people who I definitely still want in my life but maybe aren’t as close with.

With all that being said… other things have fallen to the wayside, like hobbies. I’ve definitely been prioritizing pretty well for myself I think: sleep, health, fitness, relationships… but what about things I, as an individual, love to spend time doing? Like blogging, or exploring the city? Dancing? I was talking to one of my close friends the other day who will be entering the workforce at the same time as me, and she said, “When people ask me if I have hobbies, I usually don’t know what to say. People like us don’t have time for hobbies anymore.”

That shook me – is that true? Again, that fear of monotony, and even complacency, might be a better word for it, is really getting to me. I refuse to believe it. I like to think this is just a transition period that’s rocking the boat a little for now.

I did start meditating everyday again using the Headspace app. I got into it two summers ago while I was studying abroad, but once my free trial ended, I stopped using it. Nowadays, I’ve been reusing the free sessions and just meditating for 3 minutes a day. So far, it’s been soothing and nice to sit still for a few minutes everyday, and I like to think it’ll payoff the next time I’m in an extremely stressful period.

Either way, I’ve been really satisfied and grateful with how my senior year played out. Sure, it was a little out of the ordinary compared to my peers’, but I’m happy that I continued to try new things for myself. Over the past few months, I’ve gained clarity on who is actually a positive influence in my life and who might continue to hype me up for my future. It’s reassuring to be able to reflect on how much I’ve actually learned about adulting in general, because I’m honestly excited to keep moving forward. My professional skills have improved even after a quarter of being at the office everyday, and I’m confident to bring those skills into my summer internship (eep! Counting down the days!).

Even though college was probably some of the best years of my life so far, I don’t feel tied down. That’s not to say I don’t regret anything from the last 4 years. I definitely feel like freshman year was a bit of a longer transition period: I didn’t come out of my shell for the first six months (y’all, I was really playing it safe with making new friends and whatnot), but little did I know that freshman year would be the basis for my strongest friendships today. I’m looking forward to moving upward and onward to exciting opportunities, moments, and people.

That’s it for now – I didn’t want to get too sappy 😂 I’m getting my wisdom teeth out soon right before my graduation ceremony, so wish me luck! June will be hectic with moving out of my current place and into a new apartment, and of course, starting my internship! I hope to pop in again on the blog soon, but until then!


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